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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25856260">when you are young they assume you know nothing</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/julyseok/pseuds/galileostooru'>galileostooru (julyseok)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Banana Fish (Anime &amp; Manga)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ash Lynx Lives, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Side Story: Garden of Light</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:34:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,064</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25856260</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/julyseok/pseuds/galileostooru</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Eiji is not Eiji if he isn't a little bit optimistic, even after all the tragic incidents that have happened. Also, if Ash could fake his death once, he could do it again.</p>
<p>Alternatively: A glimpse of what happens after Garden of Light.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ash Lynx/Okumura Eiji</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>91</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>when you are young they assume you know nothing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>inspired by <a href="https://open.spotify.com/embed/track/4R2kfaDFhslZEMJqAFNpdd">cardigan</a></p>
<p>i'm on <a href="https://twitter.com/galileosjuly">twitter</a> sometimes if you want to interact ☁️</p>
<p>happy birthday ash, you burn like the brightest star ⭐️ </p>
<p>(not beta read and i'm terrible in finding grammatical errors)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <i>But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss<br/>
I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>The smell of smoke would hang around this long<br/>
'Cause I knew everything when I was young</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>I knew I'd curse you for the longest time<br/>
Chasing shadows in the grocery line</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired<br/>
And you'd be standing' in my front porch light</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>And I knew you'd come back to me<br/>
You'd come back to me</i>
</p>
<p>For the longest time, Eiji thought he was going crazy.</p>
<p>He had to be. Otherwise, who else would pine over someone who is presumably - believed to be - dead? For the last eight years, as a matter of fact.</p>
<p>Sing had seen the body. The news was plastered in every channel. Rumors and gossip lingered in town for a few months, before slowly dissolving completely. Eiji believed it. Not because he wanted to, not because he could, but he had to. Each time Eiji was in a downward spiral, Ibe-san only felt more guilty. He needed to have a grip of reality for the sake of everyone else. </p>
<p>The facade works but sometimes he’d slip. When he sees a familiar silhouette in the grocery store, he’d chase them down the street. When he travels to Cape Cod, he’d mistaken someone else as his beloved. It was hard not to. The blonde hair, the striking side profile. Once he took a double look, though, it was quick to sink in that it was never Ash. It could never be. Ash was distinct. Ash was <i>special</i>. There could never be someone else like Ash. He was beautiful and Eiji had his face memorized like the back of his hand. Eiji would know if it was him, even if he makes a few mistakes here and there. Even after all these years.</p>
<p>Even after all these years, Eiji had quiet hopes and what-ifs. In the lonely nights, there’ll be a hopeful voice in his head. <i>If Ash could fake his death once, he could do it again</i>. He hates it when he finds himself trying to change the ending, so he tries to be happy, but his friends would catch him daydreaming of impossibilities. At first they brushed it off as a process of grief, but years have passed, and Eiji’s eyes are still hollow.</p>
<p>It was a quiet day on Tuesday afternoon when there was a letter in his mailbox, with no return address. It didn’t take Eiji a long time to recognize the careful handwriting.</p>
<p>He was overwhelmed, and then he felt dread. Was this a prank? What if someone is playing a cruel joke on him? But Eiji is not Eiji if he isn't a little bit optimistic, even after all the tragic incidents that have happened.</p>
<p>The letter ended with words only both of them knew, a secret code they came up with several years ago, when all Ash wanted to do was to protect Eiji. It was the only message that Eiji needed to know that it was written by the man himself.</p>
<p>So Eiji waited. Ran out to his mailbox everyday, hoping for something, anything. He cursed Ash after the third week of seeing an empty mail. </p>
<p>He reads and rereads the letter everyday. And one day, an epiphany strikes. Taking the letter to the darkroom where he washes his photos and holding it under a purple tinted light, there it was in all its glory. A date scribbled in wax at the bottom of the paper.</p>
<p>He could almost hear Ash snicker, <i>“Watching Detective Conan has finally paid off for you, Onii-chan.”</i></p>
<p>Eiji had been waiting for all his life. He was a shy age of eighteen when he waited for his injury to heal, missing out on all the pole vaulting opportunities in his last year of high school, and eventually losing his sports scholarship. Nineteen, when he waited in the big, luxurious apartment in New York everyday, heart in his throat, for Ash to return safely.</p>
<p>He’s twenty seven now, and he thinks all the waiting and let downs have been worthwhile. To see Ash again.</p>
<p>He waited and waited. Through the storm and winter and every failed attempt to sleep. He made an effort to go out with some of his friends. He catches up with Ibe-san once a month, much to the other’s delight. He didn't tell anyone about the letter he received, not even to Ibe-san or Max. His mother had told him he was too naive to believe in impossibilities.</p>
<p>Eiji had said it over and over again that Ash is so much bigger than any other miracle. But what would they know? In their eyes, Eiji had always just been a young boy who knew little. The only person who has truly seen Eiji as capable and whole was Ash.</p>
<p>Two years passed as slow as it could.</p>
<p>When the day finally came, Eiji felt at peace more than anything else. He sat on his front porch with his journal in his lap. The august air was crisp and the wind blew softly on his skin, and Eiji suddenly felt he could do anything. The sun was just starting to set. Under the orange hues, he began to sketch from memory. There was a photograph of the coast he took earlier that year that he still hasn't printed. He often thinks about the picture, so strikingly golden and brings warmth to his heart.</p>
<p>“You cracked the code.”</p>
<p>Ash, so much more mature but still as beautiful, was smiling down at him. When Eiji stands, he notices he’s still shorter, still smaller than Ash. Most importantly, his eyes are looking into Eiji’s with so much love, the same way they did ten years before.</p>
<p>“Ash”, his voice cracked once he finally spoke. “You came back.”</p>
<p>They hugged, and it was only when Eiji felt his own shoulders shaking that he realised he was crying. The last time Eiji cried was in the hospital too many years ago, when he begged Ash to leave. He blamed himself every time he had a flashback of that memory. How stupid of him to think he could protect Ash that way.</p>
<p>“You came back”, he repeats like a mantra. </p>
<p>“Of course I did”, Ash breathes in his hair, never once letting go. “I’ll always come back to you, Eiji.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Another win for the "Ash Lynx Lives" tag! And yes, I fucking cried my eyes out watching the show three weeks ago. </p>
<p>Kudos and comments are appreciated ☺</p></blockquote></div></div>
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